Living in the Past? ... How?
[plus Awareness Exercise]
A number of years ago, Caroline Myss recorded a series of talks on the "Anatomy of Spirit" and "Why People Don't Heal." She noticed that often we become stuck and resist Life's spirit or energy.
Sometimes when I am listening to others share, I notice they are often speaking of things that happened years ago. They may be feeling hurt or have a sense that life is unfair. It is not hard to see how we all can fall into a false identity of being a victim... mistreated by a spouse, friend, associate, or life in general.
If you stop and look at the thoughts that run through the thinking process, there can be the incessant search for 'the answer,' or a search for what I did 'wrong,' or simply the replaying of all the 'wrongs' that have been done to us.
The ego loves for us to be lost in any kind of identification with the past... or future... which keeps us distracted from being in touch with the Power of the Present Moment.
I'm not suggesting that life situations, events, and actions in the past were not real. The issue is at least two-fold. If we are to let go of being identified as a 'victim,' we must find acceptance of what was... what happened, and what is the reality of the situation in our life now. The ego would like nothing more than to have us replay the past and stay lost in suffering...looking for companions who will commiserate. This of course strengthens the 'victim' identity and we believe all the stories we continue to create as we reinterpret past events.
Secondly, we may never know what motivated others or why things happened. Trying to figure it all out is a meaningless exercise that again keeps us from the present moment. At some point, if we are choosing to heal and remember who we are, we will find a way to forgive [accept] ourselves and others and begin anew in this moment. Expectations, desires, hopes, plans, and our idea of what is 'right' all play a role in how we interpret life situations and how we feel...both past and present, conventionally speaking.
There is a time to grieve, when we have lost something or someone we love. No one can say how long that period of grief takes. There is a difference in really grieving the loss of a person or expectation... and holding on to what we wanted that did not happen. Then we are simply resisting, which can lead to depression, anger, bitterness, despair, and a number of 'negative' emotional states that can be quite unhealthy and toxic for ourselves and others. It can lead to a lack of trust in self and others and continue to keep us from being alive Now.
If we find ourselves in such a state, or if we are with someone who is lost in the state of 'suffering,' perhaps we need to ask some questions:
"Why are you [am I] telling this story, again?" ... When we are identified in a particular state or sub-personality, we tend to replay the same tapes over in our thoughts and we hear ourselves saying the same thing to others almost as a reinforcement of what we believe ... "That's my story and I'm sticking to it." He story of course sticks to us and sticks in out thoughts of how we have been 'wronged' or how life has treated us 'unfairly'...
"Is there anything I need right now?" ... At times we are so lost in trying to right the 'wrongs' of the past... or lost in concern and fear about what may happen in the future, that we forget we are really only ever alive right NOW... and unless we are in physical discomfort, we probably do not need anything to be in touch with the Life Energy streaming through us in this moment. Even physical discomfort, short of injury can be exacerbated by our mental and emotional state. Can you allow yourself to experience that you are 'OK' right in this moment?
How do we get from 'there' to Here? ... to the Present Moment?... We all need to find our own path to remembering and being present...being more centered or conscious in the moment Life gifts us. And here are a few suggestions:
- Be aware of your body right now and your breath; notice the energy and sensations within your physical form; try to stay in touch with the present experience in your body; if and when thoughts enter, simply notice them without getting sidetracked and go back to noticing you inner body sensations... As you notice places in your body that may be tense, again, breathe into that area and perhaps apply a gentle massaging action...
- If having some strong emotions, simply be with them, sit and breathe into the feeling your are having now; if you find yourself thinking or analyzing, gently shift back to being with the emotion...let it deepen and travel through it; when we resist emotions, they become submerged and may unconsciously affect our experience and actions...
- Notice the space around you; look at the scene before you as if nothing was labeled and you are seeing it for the first time... be with the experience of noticing in this moment; hear the sounds without resisting anything; let whatever sound that is present be part of the symphony of that moment; Be aware of any scents you are picking up.... Notice all your senses... all part of the gift of Life right now...
- Thoughts come and go...they continually move through us... simply notice them without thinking... let them go through... if you notice the thoughts taking a journey and playing an old tape, gently remind yourself that you are not your thoughts...and return to just being, while noticing some space between the thoughts that flow in and through...
- Listening to soothing music, taking a yoga or meditation class, finding a life coach, going for a walk in a natural setting...are all ways that may help you return to the present moment...
- Awareness [Disidentification] Exercise: Read the following to yourself as many times as you choose...
- "I experience my body, my physical form, which has many wonderful abilities to help me get around in the world and enjoy life... I am grateful for and love my body... and I am more than a body"...
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- "I experience various emotions and sensations that help me understand my interactions in the world and my reactions to what occurs... I am grateful for and love the ability to feel and sense life...and I am more than the emotions and sensations I experience...
.
- I experience thoughts that come and go in my conscious mind and I am thankful for and love the ability to think and communicate... and I am more than the thoughts that come and go...
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- I am grateful for this physical body, the emotions and sensations, and the thinking process as all important aspects of everyday living... and I am more than all of these aspects... I AM ...Pure Awareness... Consciousness... Being... in this timeless Moment... with the ability to decide how I will focus the creative life energy flowing through me...
A primary purpose of this Disidentification / Awareness Exercise is to remind us who we are and to help us detach in a healthy way from all the contents of consciousness so we may decide and act from the 'center' of our Beingness... From the 'Still-point' of Being, we choose the focus of attention and action with greater clarity and loving purpose.
In summary, we all have a 'past' in the sense that the Now has always been and we were there in the 'Now-Then' past as we are here in the 'Now-Now' present and will be present in the 'Next-Now' future.
Can you see how placing continual attention on past events... or on future possible scenarios robs us of Life Now? Getting stuck in historical mental reinterpretations or in projections and predictions into the 'future' are both ego fantasies that keep us from the Power of Life in this Moment of 'What Is.'
September 22, 2010 - John Hutchinson, Sundance Center
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"You can only perceive the beauty that lives outside you when you feel the beauty that lives inside you. Honor your body and accept it as it is. You have the right to feel beautiful and enjoy it." ~ don Miguel Ruiz
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