Glad-Sad-Mad-Okay-Presence

So often the way we feel depends on how things are going in our lives. I’m “glad” when nice things happen to me… “Nice” being defined as things that a part of me likes and enjoys… or that something turns out the way ‘I’ hoped it would turn out … At other times, I see someone do well or they are happy and glad about something, and I join in the celebratory mood.

Feeling “sad” can be a similar dynamic in which outside circumstance are not going as I had hoped… or I have lost something I wanted to continue to enjoy. Likewise, when I see things happen in the world that seem unfair, abusive, or harmful in other way, we can feel some empathy on the “sad’ side of the spectrum.

Anger is another emotion in which something happens that goes against some mindset we are holding… It may be an outcome I was hoping for which didn’t occur. It might be seeing something being done to others or myself that seems unfair and harmful.

Emotions are usually based in our mindset and values. When the emotion is present it tells us something about who we are. So emotions are a normal expression that can teach us… if we choose to look… If we think that anything is absolute, then we miss the opportunity to learn and grow. By looking we begin to identify those beliefs and values to which we are most attached and aligned. Self-examination provides the opportunity for greater awareness and choice.

At times there may be a more stoic sense of neutrality… “I’m okay”…neither positive nor negative…. just present… It can be a positive acceptance of what is… an “Okayness”… almost an “I’m okay; you’re okay; it’s okay” moment… a neutral detached, yet engaged and observing presence. This presence is a state of awareness that to others may appear as a detachment from emotions…. It may also be accompanied by a detachment from mental chatter and trying to figure things out or understand a situation… The state of presence just is… being present in a situation with a peace and calmness that allows for clear response.

In reality, there is much more that we do not ‘know’ than what we do know… yet our feelings often point to the underlying assumptions, beliefs, and thought-forms we hold in our egoic mental make-up. We may reflect or mirror someone’s emotions they are sharing with us in empathy and support…yet we do not need to take on their emotions as our own.

At times, I have been seen as aloof or detached, when in fact I may be fully engaged and feeling something quite intense within. Some of us tend to be more process observers. Introverts tend to process things within, often showing less demonstrable reactions to situations. Extroverted folks tend to process things out-loud and prefer the presence of others to share their thoughts and feelings.

It is good to feel our feelings… Its natural… Our emotions are a vital and important aspect of our make-up. They teach us about what is going on and what basic values and beliefs we have. They help us connect with one another… And, we are more than our feelings. We are always much more than we ‘think’ we are…. Stay tuned…

John HutchinsonSundance Center for Conscious Living - www.sunhutch.com
john@sunhutch.com
May 24, 2014

Practical responses for dealing with upsets and obsessions... Part 1

Greetings again... friends, family, and other acquaintances... 

I recently sent you an email with the following question:

What method or practices do you use to return your awareness to a more centered state?

Here are some responses I have received so far:

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"Good morning John,

Meditation or prayer to get peace of mind first and foremost helps me

when I am upset or obsessing. Having a good cry or a good laugh helps

relieve the tension. Also doing something physical yet is gentle to myself

such as Qigong or pilates or yoga stretches to release tension. Get a hug from a friend. Soak in my hot tub until I look like a raisin.

I use distractions such as taking a walk or a hike in nature, or I go out

dancing or out to a restaurant to socialize, or make a great meal (the kitchen can be my place of zen)..watch an inspirational movie or listen to a motivational speaker. 

Get a massage. If budget allows, some retail therapy at the local Goodwill.

I either draw or paint something, putter in my garden.

Give myself small rewards of chocolate or add a few dollars into my travel

jar when I have a certain amount of time I do not obsess about a person, thing, or place.. 

Talk therapy -either with friends or group therapy. Ask for advice. Ponder on that advice. Find other positive thoughts to replace the obsessive thoughts.  Reward myself again...Chocolate...

Do something nice for a friend.

Read a good book. Go on the internet or to the library to

research the topic I may be upset or obsessing about.

Buy myself some flowers or plant some flowers.

Take a bunch of vitamins thinking I might be low on something

that I am feeling upset due to a chemical imbalance or a vitamin

deficiency..

Take a drive, take a vacation, plan a vacation or

......just get a good night's sleep..

This is what I do when I am bothered..." LLL, Oregon

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"Deep breathing usually works for me... "  PDM, CO

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"Hi John.....what a wonder-full invitation to share spirit...who is the real author, no need for anonymity!

The tool I use is an ancient Buddhist technique called Tonglen....you breath into your heart center anything that needs transforming. Picture the issue in a black cloud, have the courage to breathe it into your heart center (knowing you can never take it on) and breathe out as white light and love to the thing in question.  Do it as long and often as you like and it's guaranteed. Been doing it many years and love the simplicity of it.  What I've learned from studying Heart Math is the scientific measuring of the heart's electromagnetic field.....it's huge and way "huger" than the electromagnetic field of the brain!  The ego doesn't like it much, but it'll just have to get used to it! Heart trumps brain every time!  The scientists still can't pinpoint exactly how the heart starts beating in  a fetus, the closest they can surmise is that it actually starts itself, way before the first brain cell is developed! Way cool.

Speaking of Namaste, I just got a t-shirt that says "Namaste y'all".....
Much love to you from the Ohio Hillbilly on the path!" ... KSG, Ohio

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Hi John,
A very interesting  question ,and one i have been paying attention to.
Here is something i read in a Doreen Virtue book, Goddesses and Angels.

She says that a cledon is a message from the universe which does not seem directly related to you but somehow answers your questions. She says you should go out in nature, present the question and watch for what you can see.
For example  i went on a walk to ask about a man who had been very verbally abusive to me. i saw the following cledons:

1.) a robin sitting on a dead tree stump. there  were lots of healthy trees and grass filled with juicy worms, but the robin stayed on the stump. I thought."Who is living in the dead past and not enjoying new possibilities?"

2.) i saw  a  bag of garbage on the ground. The message seemed to be."Some people  just dump their garbage anywhere."

3.) There was a young man who was riding a ride-on mover. As he approached me he looked at my face,and  stopped the mower until  i had safely passed. I thought, "Wise young man. He makes sure the other person feels safe before proceeding. My (now former) friend did not do so."

4.) I later received a phone call from a girl friend about a completely different person who had been abusive to her.  There were so many similarities in the situations! As I helped my friend to understand that her former boyfriend   was abusive  because  he was jealous of her success , I understood that this was a factor in my problem also.  

The cledons seemed to give  clear messages as to how to interpret what was going on in my life. This is because everything is connected, and if we pay attention we can always see messages which relate to our issues." ....CN 

[[[The above from CN is similar to the Native American Medicine Walk in Nature in which the participant would take certain concerns or questions with them as they walked through nature and allow Great Spirit to speak with him or her in a quite natural and intuitive way... This also is the forerunner of the Fusion13 Rune Readings that I use and share with others... jh]]]

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Thank you for these responses and look forward to more to share... I will add my favorites in Part 2....

Namaste,

John

PS>> This will also be posted at the www.sunhutch.com blog site...

.......

Expect the unexpected... and may Loving Kindness be our Guide... 

John Hutchinson  ~ Denver, Colorado 

Life Coach, Dream Guide, and Transition Consultant

www.SunHutch.com  ~  john@SunHutch.com

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"A Heart filled with Love is like a phoenix that no cage can hold." ~ Rumi 

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Click to request a Fusion13 Rune Reading: http://www.123contactform.com/form-530671/My-Form

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Life Challenges... Be Here Now....

Life comes with challenges.... as well as times of peace.
Some times we consider challengess and problems as something that has gone wrong with "Life."

If we expect a life without bumps in the road...without issues, problems, challenges, rough times... then we will live a life of frustration that Life isn't what we want it to be...

Is there a way to embrace and accept the rough times along with the easy times?

It is through the rough patches that we are given the opportunity to respond in creative and loving ways.

Today as I talked with a dear friend, she shared the following story, which I repeat here with my intrepretations of course...

A woman was talking with my friend and had come to conclusion that so much was coming up in her life and she was simply overwhelmed with feelings. We will call her Sue. Sue decided to visit a former dance teacher who was in the hospital and was 92 years young. When sue arrived, the teacher's daughter was there and infomed her that her mother was in a semi-coma and hadn't been able to speak in days. Her health was failing quickly and she really was awake to visite with Sue. Well, Sue said that was okay and that would just talk to her and spend a short time.

So, Sue sat with her former teacher and taking her hand, began to share all that she appreciated about their times together over the years. About the time Sue was ready to go, she felt a squeeze in her hand and her teacher opened her eyes and said, "Have fun!"  ... then went back into her rest...

This so affected Sue and she began to cry and release all the emotions that had building up... she could not control and emotional release that continued throughout the day... with those two words, "Have fun," Sue was able to let go all of the weight of emotional baggege she had been carrying with her and indeed began to find the fun in life.

I wish each one of us the openness to accept life's challenges as they are and simply do what we need to to deal with them... and in the process of always being present, may we enjoy Life and "Have fun!"

Sue's former teacher is still her teacher, even as she faces the challenge of releasing this life!